The past few months that we have spent at home as a result of this pandemic has tested the communication skills of most families. Staying together even as a family for a long period can lead to an increase in tension and the likelihood of sibling rivalry and quarrel. When family members stay together for a long time, their communication skills and relationship is put to test, flaws and limitations are revealed.
If as a parent your style of parenting is the nonchalant type where you say “whatever happens”, without acting, your kids are going to grow up without proper structure. In a family where the children and parents go about their separate lives, you will see that the parents will find themselves locked out of their family circle. There won’t be cohesion, and this might affect the mental health of the kids.
Collaborative family
Life in this pandemic period suits parents that include themselves in the family – both husband and wife. This style of parenting develops the child better, knowing that the parents are always there.
Collaborative parents work in such a way that the rules that govern the family life are not only for the kids but also for the parent. For example, gadget time that applies to the kids also applies to the parents. This style gives space for respect, the kids are treated in respectful ways, and the parents expect that the kids also treat them and others with respect.
If the children in any way fail to treat others with respect, they are cautioned and reminded of their obligation to others.
Practices involved in collaborative parenting
- In families where collaborative parenting is practiced, the parents make use of the word “We”. They use this to include their kids in the family and remind them of their duty to the family. For instance, “We’re expecting you have decluttered the garage before we get back from work”
- In collaborative families, rituals like family time, movie night, and special days are used to strengthen the family bond. They include fun times and lots of activities that includes every member of the family.
- Children in collaborative families help around the house without expecting any form of reward or payment in return. A job roaster is created to help make this possible.
- Also in collaborative families, the kids are included in the decision making at home. Family meetings are created to do this, and also to settle sibling quarrels and fights. This kind of meetings take time to form, but once it starts to work, it becomes a part of the family culture.
There are various ways to raise the family, but the collaborative style which although takes time to master is the best when you want your kids’ cooperation. This is the best time to start incorporating this style into your home, the benefits will stay with you even after the end of the pandemic.
