Everyone wants their children to be well-behaved and to have the best grades at school. Raising a child is a monumental task that comes with various challenges. If your child is having trouble at school, it will affect their education, personality, and social connections.
Simply asking your child to behave well is never enough for them to do as you ask. Having a call from the school telling you that your kid has gotten into trouble is often confusing and embarrassing. Fret not; you are not alone. A lot of parents are confused about how to make their children behave well at school. Read on to learn the best approaches to take.
Set a Good Example for Them
Kids copy their parents’ behavior. In order to instill discipline in them, you must first take into account your own behavior around them. If you want them to say “thank you” and “please”, you should make this your practice. If you want them to treat others well, you have to do the same. Kids learn from actions more than words and they imitate a lot of things their parents do. If you don’t see any changes in their behavior, be consistent with your own and you will start to notice the difference.
Recognize Good Behavior
This is a sensitive issue as it can backfire if you’ve done it wrong. Rewarding good behavior is important since it incentivizes them to try to do their best to be well-behaved. However, certain reward systems can have the undesired effect of teaching them that good deeds are to be done only within the context of compensation.
Try acknowledging good behavior with words of praise, more video game time, cooking their favorite meal, and so on. Show them how their actions affect the people around them and help them understand the inherent value in simply being good for goodness’ sake
Don’t Defend Them When They Are in the Wrong
It’s easy to turn a blind eye when it comes to your kid’s behavior at school. We don’t want to see them as troublemakers or deviants. Defending your kids’ wrong actions has a devastating effect on their behavior as they’ll believe that what they did is acceptable. The first thing you need to do is accept the fact that your child misbehaved or is a troublemaker. If, for example, you’re informed that your child was caught vaping in the bathroom by vape detectors, as seen on https://tritonsensors.com/, you need to address this behavior with your child and help them see the error of their ways, even in front of their teacher or principal. Instead of becoming combative with the school administration, address the misbehavior and reward your kid for not repeating it.
Let Your Kids Be Decision Makers
When kids feel powerless, they often get frustrated and may lash out at others. Giving your kids the skills and tools to take care of themselves will empower them and this will in turn encourage them to behave better. They will not come to you kicking and screaming as they will be more inclined to figure things out on their own.
When your kids are old enough, allow them the freedom to make certain choices. For example, ask them if they want cereal or eggs for breakfast or what sandwiches they want to take to school for lunch. Start with small decisions and gradually increase them. This will familiarize them with the concept of consequences – the fact that their decisions and actions have outcomes that they can control by simply making the right choice.
Let Them Express Their Feelings
Children tend to keep to themselves if they don’t want to make their parents worried or if they think they will not be heard or understood. Your role is to encourage them to express their feelings, and no matter how minuscule the problem is in your opinion, you must try to understand where they are coming from.
They will trust you more if you make a habit of listening to them and allowing them to express how they feel. They will act out if they feel misunderstood or neglected and it will show in their behavior at school. Give reassurances that whatever they are feeling, they are safe with you and you will take care of them and their feelings.
However, don’t pressure them to talk about their feelings if they are not ready. It might cause them to become even more guarded, so give them space and let them know you are there whenever they are ready to talk things out.
Fixing or improving kids’ behavior starts at home, and particularly with you. You are a role model to them and they will copy the behavior of the adults around them. For this reason, you’ll need to pay particular attention to your own behavior and that of the other adults within the home. Encourage your children and recognize their efforts and good manners in ways they’ll appreciate. Let them be decision-makers and allow them to express their feelings and you will notice a significant change in their behavior.
